Small World

Yesterday we went to a surprise birthday party for my mother-in-law. She lives up by the lake, about an hour away from us. My father-in-law and some of their friends planned the party. I took my boys up there early (my husband couldn't get off work early to make the surprise, so he met us there). We were one of the first to arrive. As some of my MIL's friends got there, I recognized some faces, but didn't know all of them by name. These ladies are pretty nice, and one of them and I were talking. She was telling me how she teaches preschool, for kids with disabilities. We were chatting about how this year has been a little more physical for her, with having 3 children who are not mobile. I mentioned that Mr. O has a friend in his class who is also not mobile, and I said that he had down syndrome. I have to believe that she must have known that. But after saying that, she started to tell me about a child that she has in class with ds. She said that this child was from a village. Overseas. Adopted. I had said something about how wonderful that was, and how I follow an international ministry for orphan children with down syndrome. She seemed to recognize what I was saying, and asked if it was a rainbow, or something like that. I said - Reece's Rainbow? She said yes. That was who helped them. So, I immediately told her how wonderful this ministry was (which she agreed) and then told her about Jamison, and how I am trying to help raise money for his adoption.

This was a really awesome and positive. A long way we have come in 5 years.

After Mr. O was born, I was still adjusting to his down syndrome that summer. It took a little while. I was very self conscious about a lot of things. What other people would think of Owen. What would they think of me. Lots of little, unimportant to me now, things. There were only two people, outside of my parents, Don's parents, and my brothers, who I told about the diagnosis right away. I felt very strongly about people meeting Owen before telling them. I was afraid if they new before they saw him, they would get a picture in their head that Owen was a monster or something. And he was just a baby. Like any other baby.

We went up to visit my in-laws late that summer. There was some sort of party going on and we went down to it. Almost immediately I felt as if everyone knew. Of course they did, my mother-in-law told them. And why not? These were her friends to tell.

So we wheeled Owen down in his stroller, he was napping, Jason and Don were with me. And the four of us kinda hung out by ourselves. No one was coming up to us to say hi, talk or meet our new baby. Very different than when Jason was little.

Usually everyone loves to see a new baby. And Owen would have been less than 3 months old. It was very weird. I felt very out of place. This was what I had feared most - being cast outs.

Now, there were a couple of my MIL's friends who did come over. Sharon, who is like Aunt Sharon, a friend so close, she is more like family. And Donna, another really good friend, who is like family.

Even Don had to admit he felt the same way I did, that we were ignored. I guess people just don't know how to react.

The good news, things have changed. My in-laws will usually watch the boys for a couple days each summer so Don and I can go away. This is such a blessing! We may not visit or see them much, and this is a great gift from them. My boys hang out with grandma on these visits. They ride on the golf cart, visit friends, go to the "club", wherever. It is a lot of fun for them (and I hope for my mother-in-law as well). So, I think the boys know their friends better than I do! And as time has passes, Mr. O has won over them. I feel much more accepted, no longer judged by the people at the lake.

And to know someone up there - who knows a family, who went halfway around the world, to bring home an angel with down syndrome, brings joy to me. It shows just how much worth people with Down syndrome have. They are wanted. They add joy and love to our lives, to the world.

I always think it would be cool to seek out and adopt a child with Down syndrome to show the world that Down syndrome is not a bad or feel sorry for me thing. That, in fact, it is so wonderful that we would do it all again! We have been asked, outright and implied, "what if" we had another baby with Down syndrome? In the tone, one is bad enough, what would you do with two?

Adoption is a very serious and personal choice. As I have mentioned before, I am adopted. I am very pro-adoption. After much prayer and soul searching, I know that adoption is not where we are supposed to go at this time. And it is that knowing that brings me to raising money for Jamison. If I could be any bit of help, to find his forever family, to help their financial burden, to bring him home, I would be honored.